What Once Was Mine
by Nealina Rodriguez-Wesker
Summary: Nexa can do nothing but watch everyone she knows, she cares for, fall. Only being able to see her redheaded husband one more time before he falls she expects the end for her as well. Until she learns the truth as will as a new reason to keep living. She only wishes for Axel to be able to share this new discovery with her. For fate to change and the clock to reverse. Mentions:XigDem
1. Chapter 1

**Erro, loves ! Back with another fic ! I wrote this one on my phone as well and SunsetLover1234, again inspired me to publish it.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts or Organization XIII.**

 **Hope y'all enjoy !**

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It was a calm night in the World That Never Was. Wish I could have been here the whole day but damn Saïx had to send me to Agrabah ! Not only was it excruciatingly hot but I had to work with Xigbar. I mean I adore Xiggy but he has been so odd lately. More cocky than usual really, and more of an ass. I remember us being good friends back when we had hearts. It's one of the first few memories that came back after finding out Xemnas and Saïx have been lieing to my brothers and I about Xemnas being our father, I still don't forgive them. I get to my room and peel off my Organization coat and hang it on the bedframe. I lay down on the bed and think of all that's been happening with Sora. How I'm the last one of my family here. Marluxia, my oldest brother, was killed in Castle Oblivion by Sora. Zexion, my youngest brother, was killed in Castle Oblivion as well but by that wretched replica that imbecile Vexen created. And Demyx, my second youngest brother, was killed by Sora in our home town a few days ago. Sora...who knew the little kid I helped raise would either be the one to kill us or set us free.

I heard a knock at the door "Come in !" My husband, Axel came in. "Hey, babe..." I jumped up and close the door with my powers. "What are you doing here ?!" I shout whisper, "They are going to find you and try to eliminate you !" He came to me and sat on my bed, "Babe...are they making you do it too ?" I looked down "They are aren't they ? What else do they want you to do ? No...what are they forcing you to do ?!" He put his hand on my face gently and at my lack of response I felt his hands begin to grow warm in anger. As he was pulling away I grabbed his hand. "Axel, no ! They'll kill you !" He held my hand and put his other hand to my waist pulling me close. He released my hand and grabbed the back of my head, pulling me to his chest. "Nexa, whatever happens...I love you...always have and always will. I know Saïx always called us stupid for saying it, saying that we don't have hearts and can't feel. I don't know if it's the memory of our love drawing me to you again or they are wrong and we do have our hearts. I feel it..." he pulled away slightly to grab my left hand, with my ring on it, and put it to where his heart would be - no - where his heart is, "right here." I swear I felt a beat. I look up into his emerald eyes and wrap my arms around his neck to pull him into a kiss. This...feeling ? It isn't just love...I think I feel...fear ?

I pull him closer and kiss him vigorously. I need him...I don't know what this is but...its driving me to needing him. I pull away to let him catch his breath, "Lea..." he froze and looked into my eyes, burying his right hand into my silver hair, I smiled as I remembered he always loved playing with it. I bit my lip, "I need you, Lea." He gave me a sweet and gentle smile as he wrapped his arm around my waist and gently layed me down. The night was filled with passion and love as we whispered our real names to Kingdom Hearts.

As we held each others hands, our rings shining with Kingdom Hearts' light and clinking together.

Proof that we do have hearts.

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 **Had to cut this one short here because I cannot write smut xD.**

 **Welp, I hope you liked it ! R &R, please ! No flames cuz only Axel can do that *wink, wink, wonk, wonk***

 **~Bye, lovelies \ (^_^)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer : I do not own Kingdom Hearts or Organization XIII. There is also a few swear words in this, sorry for my language.**

 **Hope y'all enjoy !**

I woke up the next morning alone, sadly and thankfully. As much as I wanted to wake up in his arms I knew it would be dangerous for one of the surviving members could come in and see him, eliminate him on the spot. I gently sat up thinking about last night...I can't help but feel like it was the last. I held my blanket to my naked chest as I stood up and began to search for new undergarments. When I found some I put them on and began to put on my black undershirt, pants and boots. As I began tucking in my shirt I paused my hands on my stomach. I turn to the mirror and begin to stare at it. I don't know why but I feel the need to protect it. I shook my head again and finished putting on the rest of my clothes. I turned back to the bed frame to grab my coat and put it on as I begin to leave the room and meet the rest of the surviving members in The Round Room, or should I say Where Nothing Gathers.

I walk into the Grey Area to begin portaling myself in The Round Room but I'm stopped by a poker card flying past me. "Nexa ! Let's play !" I laugh at the excited British accent of none other than Luxord. "Sorry, Lux." I turn towards him. "We have a meeting today, remember ?" His shoulders sag as he roles his eyes. "The Superior really needs to give us a break ! We went from 14 members to 9 members to 5 members, and all while having missions in between ! I don't know about you but I am beat, Xigbar admitted to being exhausted as well." I looked down as he mentioned the members we have lost. My three brothers were killed and Axel was banned because he betrayed the Organization. He is trying to help Sora, partly because of Roxas being his nobody and our best friend and partly because I can't. Saïx and Xemnas have me on timed missions and if I come later or don't come they send either Xigbar or Luxord after me. They know I'm not welling to fight or hurt them which is why they are sent. I don't understand why they need me but I wish I could be helping Sora as well. "Nex ? You ok ?" I'm snapped out of my thoughts as Luxord gives me a concerned gaze. "I'm good. Just tired like you said. Come on, let's get to Where Nothing Gathers." I know he doesn't believe me given the frown he is giving me but I don't want to bother. He nods as we portal ourselves into our assigned seats in The Round Room.

I sat next to Saïx, Number VII, and across from us to the left was Luxord, Number XI all alone given everyone was gone. I look at the empty seat directly across from me which used to belong to Axel, Number VIII. He always would joke how he wanted to switch positions and be Number IX to seat next to Saïx. Saïx would always just give him a glare and send him to the Olympus Coliseum with Demyx, who never does his work. I smile at the memories as we wait for Xigbar, late which is unusual, and it wasn't long until Mr. I-Defy-Gravity came in scratching the side of his eyepatch. "Welcome, my fellow companions." We all turn towards the deep voice that belongs to our leader, Xemnas. "We must discuss how we shall greet the keyblade bearer." I watch as he turns to me, "Number IX, The Graceful Guardian, Nexalina." I tense at the use of not only my full name but my rank and title. "Yes, Superior ?" I ask in a placid tone. His smirk bothered me. "Go get set for a mission, Saïx will be by your room to assign it to you." I felt Xigbar's and Luxord's eyes on me as I responded, "Yes, Superior." I caught a glimpse of both before I looked down at my lap and began rubbing my wedding ring. Luxord had the same sad - like expression as me and Xigbar only had it for a split second before putting on his usual smirk though this time it wasn't real. I zoned out for the rest of the meeting and just reminisced the old days until Xemnas said "Alright, comrades. That is all. You are dismissed." With that we all teleported to our rooms.

When I got into my room I began packing some potions and elixirs for my mission. Once I felt satisfied I began adjusting my coat. I looked at myself in the mirror and couldn't stop catching glimpses at my stomach. I gave it a gentle rub before shaking my head and turning to look for my gloves. As I began reaching for them Xigbar came in. I gave him a smile, "Hey, Xiggy !" He smiled as his eyes showed nostalgia. "Hey, Nexy" he sat on my bed as I grabbed my gloves. "Nervous ?" He asked as I sat next to him. I lifted my legs one by one to tighten my boots a bit more, "No. Why would I be ?" I asked as lower my legs and bend over to fix my pants in them. I hear him sigh, "Nex...the last few times the Superior has had a meeting like today we lost a member. Specifically the one sent on the mission involving Sora." I straighten up and turn to him, "It'll be fine, Xig. Why are you the worried one ?" I question as I begin putting on my right glove. I catch his eyes looking at my left hand, specifically where my wedding ring lay. "Demyx wouldn't have wanted anything to happen to you."

I froze, remembering how Xigbar and Demyx had a relationship that was only hidden from Xemnas. Demyx adored Xigbar, and Xigbar adored Demyx. After Demyx was eliminated I came back from my mission and went straight to Xigbar to tell him. He didn't even question how I knew cuz he remembered that I was able to feel a strike in my chest when a family member died. We have been going on missions together since. "I know..." I sighed as I began to put on my left glove. "But, sadly, it's harder to end me." He put his hand on my shoulder, "Nexa" I look up to look into his golden eye and see determination in it. "Go out there and show them what a Rodriguez-Wesker is made of." We shared one last smile as he left to his own room. I turned to the mirror one last time to put my hair up in a pony tail. I have it really long and don't want it getting in the way. I take one last look then begin walking out of my room and walking to the Grey Area to find Saïx.

"Number IX." I roll my eyes and cringe at the voice as I turn towards it. "Yes, Number VII ?" I respond in a mocking tone. He gave me a slight glare at the act, "You are needed in Twilight Town. The keyblade bearer is currently there with his idiot companions and so is that insolent nobody known as Axel. Xemnas requested you to stop them seeing as you are close to both." I tighten my jaw and bare my teeth as he gives a smug look, knowing how much I wish to harm him. I take a deep breath and give a tight smile, "Alright." As I begin to walk to the Grey Area to leave I stop and hear his footsteps stop as well behind me. "Why are you like this ?" I hear him sigh, "I remember when the three of us would eat ice cream together and run around the kingdom. How you guys always tried breaking into my castle and were so happy when my parents allowed you to stay." He began to walk around me, ignoring the truth. "What happened to you, Isa ?!" He stopped at his real name. "We were best friends ! You, me, and Lea ! What happened ?!" He looked took a deep breath. "We don't know where Isa is anymore ! We only have this sorry excuse who orders us around and calls us by are damn numbers in this wretched Organization !" He looked down. "And you stay quite because you know it's the truth...who the fuck are you ?"

He tensed at my use of language and turned his head to look at me over his shoulder, "Just get the job done, Number IX." with that he continued his walk to the Grey Area...and so did I. I turn to the couches to see Luxord and Xigbar looking at me with sad eyes. I can't help but laugh in my head. We "don't have hearts" yet look at us. I give them a smile and nod my head before opening a portal and walking through it. A feeling of unease falls on my shoulders as a walk out of the portal and into the the computer room in the old mansion hidden in Twilight Town. I walk into the basement hall where I see a few nobodies near a portal. I walk towards the portal and send the nobodies back to The Castle That Never Was.

As they left I stood in front of the portal questioning if I was really going to try and defeat my childhood friend and my husband. I walk in to see Sora, Donald, and Goofy fighting nobodies. As I began walking towards them a voice stopped me. "Don't stop moving, or the darkness will overtake you !" I froze at the voice.

 **R &R, please.**

 **Again sorry for my language here xD**

 **Bye, lovelies \ (^_^)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer : I do not own Kingdom Hearts or Organization XIII.**

 **Enjoy ! ^_^**

In came Axel hitting the dusks, he used to control these things. Now he is killing them, to keep Sora...Roxas...safe. "Get going !" He yelled at them. "Don't ask just do it !" A dusk hit him and knocked him down. Sora fought his way to Axel and crouched down to hear Axel's explanation. They stood up and began to fight the nobodies. I noticed Axel looked weak, exhausted. I looked to Sora and noticed that a dancer was getting ready to grab him so I decided to jump in myself to help. "Look out !" I warned as I summoned a kunai to throw at the dancer. As it vanished Sora turned at my voice and ran to me hugging my waist. "Nea ! I - I'm so happy you are here and safe ! What has the Organization done to you ?!" I hugged him and gave him a giggle before ruffling his hair and pulling away. "Come on !" I turned to Axel as he walked towards me and wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me in for a quick and gentle kiss. "We have some nobodies to eliminate." he said. We nodded in agreement and seperated to fight.

We ended up back to back surrounded by them. Sadly, the second I hit the dancer I was unable to control them anymore. "I think I liked it better when they were on my side." Axel groaned. I chuckled, "I agree." Sora turned to us, "Feeling a little...regret ?" he joked. I vigorously shook my head as Axel said "Nah. I can handle these punks." He crouched towards us, "watch this !" He leaped to another area surrounded by nobodies and began summoning his fire, his chakrams circling around him as he began curling up into a ball. I covered Sora to prevent him from being injured and closed my eyes hoping he wouldn't waste too much of the little power he had left. I opened my eyes to see him being surrounded by fire and with a final shout he straightened out, a heart around him and the fire exploded eliminating all the dusks. Sora and I covered our eyes as a bright light flashed. When it cleared we ran to the end of the inside of the portal where Axel lay...he was fading.

"Axel !" I screamed as I fell on my knees in front of him. I put my head on his chest as he struggled to lift his hand and put it in my hair. Playing with it one last time. "Sorry, babe...guess it really is up to you to look after them. As long as you-" "I don't want to hear it !" I yelled. "You are not going to fade ! You can't fade !" I looked into his eyes. Emerald looking into green pupils with deep blue rings. "Babe..." he put his hand to my cheek and gently pulled my face to his. Giving me a love filled kiss. As I pulled away Sora kneeled next to me, "You're...fading away." he pointed out. "Well, that's what happens when you put your whole being into an attack. You know what I mean ?" He scoffed. "Not that Nobodies actually HAVE beings... right?" he scoffed "Anyway, I digress. Go, find Kairi. Oh, almost forgot... Sorry for what I did to her." I shook my head. This cannot be happening. "Well when we find her you can tell her that yourself !" Sora said, determined to have Axel there. I gave a smile laugh and Axel smiled. "Think I'll pass. My heart just wouldn't be in it, you know? Haven't got one." He gave a dry laugh.

"Axel...what were you trying to do ?" Sora asked. I looked down, knowing the answer. "I wanted to see Roxas." I noticed Sora's jump of surprise. "He... was the only one I liked... He made me feel... like I had a heart. It's kind of... funny... You make me feel... the same..." he frowned. "Kairi's in the castle dungeon. Now go." He struggled as he lifted his hand opening a portal to The World That Never Was. He turned to me one last time. "Take care of him, baby...and Sora ?" Sora straightened, "Look after her. Make sure she keeps going." He nodded and gave a small salute. "Babe ?" I opened my eyes. When did I close them ? "I love you." He gave me one last smile. "Got it memorized ?" I gave a giggle as my eyes got watery. I held his hand as he faded into the air. I looked up, "I love you too. And I hope YOU got it memorized." I felt something fall down my eye and drip to the floor I took off my glove and gently rubbed it off. "Let's go." Sora nodded as we walked into The World That Never Was.

 **Got feels while writing this. Axel's death put me to tears, literally, when I first saw my uncle play KH II. I was around 10 or 11 I believe. He told me in 2009 when 358/2 Days came out that that was the game I always begged for him to play xD. He even bought me KH:DDD Mark Of Mastery Edition in 2012 ! I love my uncle, and I was destined to love KH, haha.**

 **Anyways enough fangirling !**

 **R &R, please. **

**~ Bye, lovelies \ (^_^)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer : Do NOT own Kingdom Hearts or Organization XIII. "What Once Was Mine" (or "Healing Incantation") belongs to Disney Tangled and is sung by Mandy Moore.**

 **Enjoy !**

While Sora was defeating Saïx I was alone in the room known as Proof Of Existence. This room consists of 14 doors, a door for each member of the Organization. Each door had a members title and weapon painted on it. Riku was right, it felt like a graveyard. I went up to Zexion's, Demyx's, and Marluxia's. I hugged Demyx's and Marluxia's, Zexion's door was broken and laid on the platform of it. They were all glowing red. They were all blue before but when the member dies their door turns red. I walked up to Axel's door, which still glowed blue. My whole reason in the Organization was a lie. We did have hearts all along. Xemnas was just lieing to us, using us for his own gain.

For what exactly ? I don't know, but I have been angry ever since I figured it out. Sadly it was too late. I kneeled before his door...grave...reading his title, "Number VIII, Flurry Of The Dancing Flames." My eyes began to water. When we got here I had to use my power to get Sora and his friends in safely. When we ran into Riku, he noticed something off with me. He said that I was glowing. King Mickey examined me and stated that I was with child. I broke down, I have Axel's child in me...and they won't get to see their father...Axel didn't even know ! I rubbed my belly. "Lets do something for daddy ?" I remembered how much Axel loved to hear me sing, so I took a breath and began,

 _ **"Flower, gleam and glow."**_

The power of light.

 _ **"Let your power shine."**_

I have had the ability to wield it all this time.

 _ **"Make the clock reverse."**_

This lie...the reason they are all died.

 _ **"Bring back what once was mine."**_

Memories of Axel and the Organization. How close we all were.

 _ **"Heal what has been hurt"**_

All the hearts in all the worlds we have been sent to. All the hearts we have collected...our hearts...

 _ **"Change the Fates' design"**_

We could have changed the outcome...

 _ **"Save what has been lost"**_

Memories of our childhood. How much fun Isa, Lea, and I would have. How much time we spent with my brothers.

 _ **"Bring back what once was mine"**_

Our wedding...we were so happy. 'I'll never let you go. You are my heart and always will be.' Our last night together he said the same words as our rings clinked together.

 _ **"What once was mine"**_

I cried as the door turned red and all these memories rushed through my head. I crawled close to his door and hugged it, making sure my stomach touched it. I stayed this way for a while, rubbing my stomach. I later stood and wiped my tears away as I walked to my door, the last blue door active. I stared at it in anger. There is no need for it. I summoned my gun blades and used both to impale it straight through the drawing of my blades. I waited as the blue faded to red. When it did I dismissed my blades as Sora and the gang came back. "Nexa ? You okay ?" I turned to Riku and smiled. "The door is red. So Nexa is no more." They all smiled and walked to me as I removed my coat, leaving me in my black jeans and undershirt. "Come on ! Now we just have to defeat Xemnas !" I nodded and watched as they went ahead.

I stayed back looking at the graves. I hung my coat over my door, ran my hand down Axel's one last time then walked to the middle of the Proof of Existence. I took one last look at all of the doors...the proof of all the souls who have suffered through a lie. I turned and began walking out. I stopped at the door and took one last look over my shoulder.

"We are finally free, my friends. You can now rest,...heal. You all did a great job. I will get you revenge."

I turned forward ready to make the promise true.

 **Hope y'all enjoyed this story ! I am currently working and an epilogue involving Dream Drop Distance. I am excited to finish and post it ! I also really love this song. I was inspired to write this fic by watching an Akuroku (guilty pleasure xD) vid with this song.**

 **Please, R &R !**

 **~Bye, lovelies \ (^_^) /**


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